Monday, February 7, 2011

Hard Time

Lately, I've really started having a hard time not holding Abigail or being around her. I've been really really sick so I've been home from work with her more, and it makes me realize how much I love her, how great the past 11 months (ELEVEN!!) have been and how much I'm missing each day I'm gone. Putting Abs to bed at night kills me because it means there are 12 hrs I'm not loving on my sweet girl!  Who wouldn't feel that way when they see this face:

See her sick eyes?? That's because I've been snuggling her too much while I'm sick! She was bundled up this weekend to go to breakfast at McDonald's with Daddy while I slept a bit (he wanted her to try their oatmeal - she's not a fan...apparently she likes only the bland stuff from the box).

Anyhow, there are several reasons why I could be getting super emotional about being in a different room then Abigail lately:

1) I want another one and it's the wrong time for us (it really is - we've prayed about this and discussed it thoroughly...not the answer I wanted but the answer I need to trust)

2) Somewhere deep down I want to be a stay at home mom, which is a shock to me...not a possibility for at least another year and a half. And I am happy to support my wonderful husband's schooling until that point. We agreed I'd be home with kid(s) after that.

3) I'm PMS-ing desperately and am emotional about everything.

4) My antibiotic has me a bit down lately because of its side effects...thus, more emotional as well.

5) Abs is the most awesome, sweet, loving, funny, smart child ever and she is irresistible!

It is likely all of these things combined!!

1 comment:

Sofia L said...

I love that you don't have a problem admitting your PMS-ing. I also understand what it's like to get an answer you weren't hoping for and having to trust in the Lord. I hope you and your sweet little girl feel better soon!